Everything changes after kids. Even V day. This is the before & after in our household …
Before Kids – A few days out
I am looking for the perfect card and the perfect gift. I carefully pursue the card aisle, comb the internet for handmade card inspiration (before the days of Pinterest) and wander the stores in the hopes the perfect gift. I ponder whether sending flowers to a man is naff or cool. Consider balloons for a short stint, but then think that would probably be more embarrassing then endearing. Settle on ordering a Mrs Field’s cookie with an I Love You iced onto it.
After Kids – the day before
Sh#$ – is it Valentine’s Day tomorrow? Quickly scrounge through the card pile to find something suitable. Nothing suitable. Get out kids craft stuff to make a card. Look at pinterest for some ideas. Try to convince kids to make card with me. Eldest child only wants to draw Skylanders. Youngest child only wants to draw on the furniture. Know I bought a present around the sales that I thought would be perfect for Valentines Day. Find present located under a basket of laundry. Wrap present.
Before Kids – the morning of
After a pleasant sleep-in (which I neither appreciate nor realise) I give my husband his card and present. He gives me a card and the promise of presents later in the day. Cue music, dimmed lights and a tasteful camera fade.
After Kids – the morning of
Baby cries, change baby, make breakfast,make lunches, do a load of washing, clean kitchen, feed dog, get eldest child ready, shower self, eat breakfast. Husband wakes. Happy Valentines Day he says sleepily and gives me a kiss. No card. Give husband card, which now has cereal spilled on it.
Before Kids – at work, during the day
Wait patiently for flowers to arrive. Check out Facebook. See gushy posts by friends about flowers and wonderful boyfriends and husbands. Like posts. Grit teeth. Email from Reception. Excitement! Damn. It’s my dry cleaning from yesterday. Another email from reception. Flowers!!!! Post nausea inducing status update. Robyna IS so in love with her wonderful husband (back in the days of Facebook status all beginning with IS and camera phones were only a rumour in Australia). Workmate offers lift home. Decide against it so that I can take the flowers on a little journey through town and on the bus. You know, because the exercise is good for me. No other reason.
After Kids – at home, during the day
Check out Facebook. See gushy posts and pictures by friends about flowers and wonderful boyfriends and husbands. Like posts. Smile ruefully. Knock at door. Damn. I have just put the baby down to sleep. Please stop knocking. Answer door. Delivery of flowers. Ah the old romantic!
Before Kids – the evening
Husband has made reservation at fancy restaurant. Get dolled up and enjoy meal with three hundred other diners under strict conditions that we vacate our table by 8pm as they have two sittings.
After Kids – the evening
Give husband gift I forgot in the morning and thank him for the beautiful and unnecessary flowers. Receive card that eldest child made at school. Decide on having fish and chips by the river with our neighbours. Watch young girls get off at the ferry stop, parading large bouquets of flowers and feigning nonchalance.