I wanted to have an honest chat about sex after children but I wondered how to do that. Then I realised that the best people to have that conversation are the ladies that first showed us how to speak openly about intimacy – welcome back Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Sam. Sex and the City returns.
This scene takes place a year after the first movie (because it’s best for everyone if we forget that second movie ever occurred). Charlotte fell pregnant again with another girl shortly after having Rose. It was not planned and she is struggling looking after three young girls. Carrie and Big have just recently had a baby, called Ryder. He wasn’t planned either, but they are both elated. He is three months old and they are planning their first night together after baby. Sam is still single, childless and loving it. She is well and healthy after her battle with cancer. Miranda and Steve are still together and Brady remains their only child.
The girls are having lunch. Harry (Charlotte’s husband) has the two older York-Goldenblatt girls and Carrie and Charlotte’s babies are both napping in their prams. So conveniently (for me), there are babies involved but the girls are able to have an uninterrupted conversation.
Charlotte (to Carrie): So tonight’s the night?
Carrie: Yep, I am a bit nervous to be honest.
Miranda: What’s happening tonight?
Charlotte (excitedly): Big and Carrie are having their first night together since having Ryder.
Miranda: What do you two love birds have planned?
Carrie: Dinner, maybe a little dancing, then a night at the Plaza whilst Big’s mom looks after Ryder.
Miranda: Oh, isn’t that a lot of pressure? I mean you just had a baby – you don’t need pressure.
Carrie: I feel all giddy about it actually.
Sam: Like you’re a virgin all over again?
Carrie: Actually, yes – I do feel a bit that way. I mean is it going to hurt?
Sam: Carrie, honey, you pushed a eight pound baby out, Big isn’t that big.
Miranda and Charlotte exchange glances.
Charlotte: It might just feel….well, different for a little while.
Miranda: Oh, I don’t think it’s down there you need to worry about. By the time you get to the hotel, you will have missed, what one or two feeds? Your girls are going to be huge and uncomfortable and you’re not going to want Big within three feet of them. I have two words for you and they ain’t sexy: Breast Pump.
Charlotte: Stop it. They are going to have a beautiful time. But, I agree with Miranda – why don’t you pop home and quickly feed Ryder after dinner?
Carrie: Ryder takes an hour to feed – there is nothing quick about it. There is no “popping”. Oh God, nothing is easy any more is it?
All girls shake their heads.
Carrie: But what about you Charlotte. How are you going with your three girls?
Charlotte: I am so tired. I can’t remember what it feels like not to be tired.
Carrie: And Harry? How is he coping with it all?
Charlotte: Oh, he’s lovely – loves the girls. He’s working a lot but that’s okay. Sometimes it’s a relief to have him out of the house.
Miranda: Working late? (Charlotte nods) You’re not worried?
Charlotte: Can I be totally honest with you? I can’t have sex with him right now. I just can’t. I am too exhausted. I almost wouldn’t care if he is having an affair – it would take the pressure of me.
Carrie: You don’t mean that! You’re just saying that because Harry would never, ever cheat on you.
Miranda: She’s just saying that because she hasn’t slept in three years.
Sam: She’s just saying that because every time she gets laid she gets pregnant these days.
Charlotte: You know what? I am terrified of that. I don’t know what I’d do if I got pregnant again.
Carrie: You would be fine – you are a terrific mother.
Charlotte: I am not. The other day I almost ran out of the house and seriously thought about not returning. Just escaping. (Starts to cry)
Carrie: (hugging Charlotte) Oh honey, I know it’s hard.
Miranda squeezes Charlotte’s hand
Sam: Okay, Aunty Sam is up for baby-sitting – you need a break and you need to sleep.
Charlotte (through tears): Really? Three girls are a lot of work.
Sam (looking directly at Charlotte and speaking softly): I’d love to.
Carrie (to Sam): How are you with all these babies? I mean is it okay? Sometimes I wonder if you know….
Sam: I regret not having kids? Yeah, because you girls make it look so great – no sleep and no sex. Listen, I decided a long time ago that kids weren’t going to be a part of my life. But I got lucky because you all had children and I get to be a part of their life AND I get to hand them back.
Charlotte (softly and looking directly at Sam): Thank you, Samantha – I mean it.
Miranda: It gets easier, truly as they get older you get more time to put back into the things you have forgotten.
Sam: Like husbands?