5 times motherhood will shake your friendships

I was one of those pregnant women who swore life WOULD NOT change after baby. I’d have the baby, go out often, travel the world, be a fun and constant friend, work full-time and climb the corporate ladder. Needless to say, things didn’t quite turn out that way.

Parenthood turns your life on its head. It shakes up everything. Including friendships. And it’s not just immediately after baby, there are other times when motherhood alters the landscape of your friendship circle.

Friendships Rocked

Here are 5 times motherhood will shake your friendships…

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When you have a tall kid …

They say that the Dutch are amongst the tallest people in the world. My mother’s side of the family certainly seems set to prove it. My gorgeous sister towers over lesser mortals at 6”4 (without heels). My uncles hover close to the heavens at nearly 7”. It seems that my darling (not-so) little E has taken up the Dutch genes. He is a tall kid. Judging by the size of his feet, he is going to be a very tall man.

When you have a tall kid

At two and a couple of months he is at least a head taller than most of his friends. He is not a string bean – his body is in proportion with his height. He still has a baby face and screw on hands and feet. But kids don’t register those things when guessing age. It’s all about height and size. (Not-so) little E will often have three and four year old kids come up to him in the park, ask him his name and if wants to play. His language and social skills don’t extend to that just yet so he smiles shyly back. The other kids shrug their shoulders and leave. And I fight the desire to run up and say: “He’s only two and he wants to play, he just can’t talk like you can yet.”

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Shopping Buddy

I adore clothes shopping. Probably a little too much.  And it doesn’t have to be shopping for me – I am just as happy to tag along on a friend’s shopping expedition. In fact, I sort of love that.

They say everyone has a secret super power – mine is an encyclopaedic knowledge of what stores stock what and where they are located in Carindale shopping centre. That and the ability to spot a bargain at fifty paces. Plus, I am pretty honest.

Do you want to come shopping with me?

Shopping Buddy

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When Anxiety Attacks


The knife is slack in my hand. The vegetables I was cutting, forgotten. Terror grips my chest and I am struggling to breathe. I am paralysed.

The family dinner is now beyond my reach. I have stopped. My body has simply stopped. My mind is racing for reasons why.

This has happened once before. Years ago. Three weeks after my son died, I collapsed to my knees, unable to continue. Raw grief, emerging from shock, forcing me to floor. Demanding that I pay my dues. Telling me to pay attention to my grief. Read more