Boys Haircuts + Pre-Judgement (yep, I do it)

It’s not nice to judge. We all know we shouldn’t do it. Aside from judging people who judge. Which is a loophole some people use that I have never quite gotten my head around. Not that I am judging them.

boys haircuts

I think I am fairly non-judgemental.  I won’t think less of a mum who loses it with her kids – we’ve all been there. I don’t normally jump to conclusions based on the way someone looks or acts. I try to teach my kids that every person has a lot more to them than initially meets the eye. But when it comes to  haircuts, particularly boys haircuts, I turn into Ms Judgement. 

If someone was to judge my hair cut they would assume I’m a busy mum who doesn’t own a hairdryer, straightener or potentially a hair brush. That’s not far off the mark. I do actually own all those things – I just don’t own the time to use them effectively.

But there is just something about boys haircuts that makes me assume all kinds of things.

Here are the stories I read into boys haircuts.

  • Number three blade or less all over. The child is either enrolling in military school or head lice has been rampant.  Given we don’t have military school in Australia, I’ll tend to assume the latter.
  • Fauxhawk. On baby in bath, hair sticking up thanks to the bubbles, it’s SO cute. On eighteen month old year old because mum has wacked a huge dollop of wax in her kid’s hair, I don’t know. Let ’em be kids?
  • Rats tail. Oh that kid is going to be delightfully well behaved.
  • Nearly bald all over aside from a comparatively long fringe. Again, I am pretty much going to assume this kid is on his way to a life of petty crime.
  • Ronaldo’s hair cut. So this is everywhere at the moment and my son really wants it. I say no. Maybe I’m just mean.

    Ronaldo

    Mummy says no.

  • Spiky every which way hair, normally reserved for Japanese anime characters and favoured by boy bands. This just looks like a great deal of work. I shall assume grand amounts of vanity and spare time. Also slightly jealous of ability to wield a hair straightener.
  • Really really really long curls. Mum just can’t bear to part with those beautiful locks. What if the curls never grow back?
  • Bowl cut. Not so common these days. Favoured by my father doling out unflattering, definitely boy-like,  haircuts back in my youth. Says we are a practical family that doesn’t waste money or time on taking kids to the hair-dresser. May explain my hairstyle prejudice as being based in some early childhood envy?
  • White blonde hair with slight greenish tinge. Have spent the better part of summer in the pool.
  • Uneven hair with obvious chunks out. Either a new hairdresser is needed pronto or someone has enjoyed some quality scissor time. My son actually cut his hair once and I didn’t notice until his teacher pointed it out.

You probably already guessed, my own boys have very boring short back and sides.  As soon as it needs to be brushed to look neat, it’s time for a haircut. They will probably end up teenagers with complicated mullets and tracks just to spite me.

Arrow 2

Do you get all judgey about rats tails?  Do you know why that haircut even exists? Being pestered about getting Ronaldo’s hair cut? Tell me.

18 thoughts on “Boys Haircuts + Pre-Judgement (yep, I do it)

  1. The Hipsterette says:

    Frullets, mullets and beyond…

    Boys and men are owning their hairstyles more and more as part of an expression of their own individuality – just as many women do.

    Some hairstyles are just very hard to pull off with flair – nothing looks more beautiful and stylish than a woman who really pull of a ‘pixie’. Same for the boys – what works for a soccer superstar is not necessarily the best look for a six-year-old!

    Let’s just accept that these boys are trying out what’s right for them – I had some shockers growing up too – the Page Boy (anyone remember Prince Valiant – that’s what I looked like), the lioness (which unfortunately just looked like a straggly mess on me).

    And in these days of FaceBook and Instagram – these sometimes regrettable hair style choices are going to be around forever – remember that boys before trying out that number 1 buzzcut!

    • Robyna says:

      Indeed – a bad haircut stays around for a lot longer than two weeks these days! I don’t mind all the unique quiffs – it’s just that most of them need product to look any good and I don’t think a six year old needs to be using product.

  2. Flat Bum Mum says:

    I wish it was as easy as a short back and sides for me Robyna. The girl hair is the bane of my existence. I would love to just run the clippers over it and be done. I don’t love a funky haircut on a little boy. I think it looks a bit weird. High ponytail buns made a very brief apperance at the school I work at. Not loving that look! Bron x Ps- No judgement about your judgement.
    Flat Bum Mum recently posted…How to wear a kimono this summerMy Profile

    • Robyna says:

      I was going to write about man buns as well – but I kind of think it’s cute on the right guy. The right guy is NOT my six year old 🙂 Hats off to mums of girls – I see the complicated braids at school and wonder how on earth they have time!

  3. Collette says:

    Totally with you on the judgement. Seriously, little boys don’t need fashion haircuts. Any kind of style or product in a little boy’s hair and I’m just like “uh oh – bogan child”. I know it’s bad, but really? Why do that to your child? Plenty of time for them to humiliate themselves with hair styles in their teen years – why start that process earlier than needed? ?
    Collette recently posted…Womenfolk Series: Meaghan SheltonMy Profile

  4. Kate @onesmalllife says:

    SO good. I say I’m non-judgemental, but we ALL say that don’t we? Truth be told I’m as judgy as the next person (in the nicest possible way). My son decided this year that he didn’t want to get his haircut and for most of his four year old kinder year I’ve been happy for him to look like some sort of boy band member or mini little surfie grommit dude but as his first ever school year looms I had to insist on a haircut. He wasn’t happy about it, and mostly I am all for them having a degree of self determination about these things, but you know what? I just couldn’t help but think his teacher was going to judge him harshly and assume him to be a trouble maker! Ah, which judging by this article may well have been the case! x
    Kate @onesmalllife recently posted…The Harshest CriticMy Profile

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