My dear friend without children

My dear friend without children

My dear friend without children.

Hundreds of years ago we used to hang out. All the time. Our lives were entwined, our dreams were aligned and our parallel paths stretched long ahead.

Then these other people came into my life. People I haven’t known as long. The little people that have snatched all of my heart and most of my time.

You and I still hang out, but it’s so different, I know. I’m sorry. Read more

Motherhood & the impossibility of down time

Motherhood and the impossibility of down time

I am lying beside my two year old. My head is full of things I should be doing but I can’t leave until he drifts off to sleep. He had a nap at daycare, which never bodes well for an easy bed-time. I can hear the television, my husband relaxing. Teeth gritted, I wish my little one to sleep. My own body is giving into exhaustion and I wonder if I will get to the writing/washing/sewing/emails/cleaning or whether I will fall from one bed to another. Another night wasted. Another pay-off for getting up at five when the boys wake and trying to squeeze a few minutes of work in before breakfast. There is precious little child-free time to book-end my day. Read more

The Evolution of Mummy

the evolution of motherhoodA group of bewildered young woman are sitting together in a coffee shop in a shopping centre. They are new friends – their babies born within a few weeks of each other. Some of those babies are asleep in the humongous prams their mothers are only just learning to drive. Others are cuddled peacefully in laps. Yet others are being fed. Those breastfeeding are anxiously looking around to ensure that they are not embarrassing themselves or anyone around them. Those bottle-feeding are hoping desperately that no-one is going to judge them. And they ask each other the rhetorical question all new mother’s ask: “Did you think it was going to be this hard?”  Read more

Valuing Motherhood

Baby and Calf - photo credit Robyna MayWhat do you do? It’s an innocuous question. An icebreaker. Something we say.

It’s not generally a request for a persons complete CV. Yet, that’s how I answer that question. I am at home at the moment on maternity leave but I will be back at work next year. I did manage IT and knowledge for a law firm, but managing a big team with children wasn’t ideal so I have moved into more of a consultative role.

It’s only recently that I have started asking myself why I do this. What am I really saying is: I am a mum, and that’s fun and all, but I am also an intelligent, successful person with a career. I am actually quite smart and valuable. And you aren’t going to see me that way if I only tell you the mum bit. Read more