I suffer from an affliction this time of year. I know I am not the only one: Christmas Tree OCD.
Before the kids, the tree was always themed. Silver and blue one year. Red and gold another. I spent a great deal of time ensuring that the baubles were spaced evenly. That the gaps were filled. If the Christmas tree lights had a section that didn’t work, I would painstaking test each bulb. Tinsel of different lengths and density belonged in different sections. There was a specific order in which the decorations were to be hung.
My husband would want to help and he was quickly he waved away. When he was given a box of old decorations by his mum (after they down-sized their tree), he looked through them with fond nostalgia. Oh, I remember this wooden horse, he said with a smile and started to put it on the tree. It’s not silver or blue, I pointed out. Why does our tree have to look like a department store prop? he asked, Why can’t it be fun and colourful? Why can’t it be full of memories? How could I argue with that? So the little horse went on the tree. Around the back. Where no-one could see him. Oh dear. My poor husband did marry a bit of a bitch didn’t he?
Since the kids I have had to relax my Christmas Tree OCD. But grudgingly.
Here are seven things that Christmas Tree OCD sufferers with children will understand:
- Finding it unbearable that there is a completely cluttered branch at exactly your child’s eye level. And bare space for miles above it.
- Waiting until everyone else is in bed to rearrange the tree.
- Battling with wanting to place certain decorations within toddler grasp for balance reasons but knowing it will spell disaster.
- Compulsively pinning pretty trees on Pinterest as a form of replacement therapy.
- Helping your child with their handmade ornament and suggesting certain themed colours in a vain attempt to preserve Christmas tree consistency.
- Looking at Facebook memes involving trees wrapped in cling-film and protected by play pens and thinking that looks like an awesome idea rather than appreciating the joke.
- Encouraging your child to have their own tree in their own room so that you can have the pretty one to yourself.